Hello people, welcome to another segment of our Elcrema Sunday love
special, a segment dedicated strictly to talks about what goes in
relationships. This is going to be the last Elcrema Sunday Love Special
of the year 2014, and just like everyone else I’m also looking forward
to the New Year and a greater Elcrema Sunday Love Special. It’s
important to note that we couldn’t have come this far without you guys.
I’ve met so many men and ladies with diverse views about sharing the
financial burden in a relationship, and more recently I was drawn to an
argument between some ladies in a forum about shared financial
responsibilities—one lady was particular about how it’s the man’s job
solely, with a few in support of her while others differed as well.
Drama and I (Shawn) would air our views on shared financial responsibilities and your views would as well be welcomed.
First, let’s read Drama’s opinion
Drama
As far as I’m concerned, this shouldn’t even be a debate. There’s a
reason it’s called a relationship, and I believe that’s because it
involves two people. Two grown people who freely decide(d) to come
together and share their lives, so how can one party expect the other to
bear all the burden that it brings? I think that is absolutely
ridiculous.
Responsibilities should be shared in relationships according to the
financial strengths of the parties involved. I would have said according
to the roles of the parties involved, but that wouldn’t be fair because
there are cases where the husband earns far lower than the wife so I
think it’s better it’s shared depending on their financial strengths.
If the man earns more, he does more, and if it’s the woman who earns
more, she gets more responsibilities. And basically, this all boils down
to having great understanding between yourself and your partner. If
that is in place, sharing responsibilities wouldn’t be a problem at all.
It’s just sad to see that most women these days want to leave
everything to the man in the relationship just because he’s ‘the man’,
but that isn’t the way it ought to be. There’s no way one person can do
everything. One of the reasons you are in their life is to help and
support them in every area, not just to warm their beds. Nothing should
be an excuse for you not to assist your partner; if you do not have a
job, go ahead and get one or start up something on your own. You can’t
expect your boyfriend to take you out on a date every time and bear the
burden of paying the bills all alone. As his girl, you’re supposed to
take care of some of it. That’s the way it should be. In fact, helping
with some of the responsibilities will earn you more respect and love
from your partner, but some people do not know this. When you’re in a
relationship, and you leave everything to the man, you make yourself a
liability, and trust me, nobody wants a liability around them. So if
you’re a woman like this, you must change your perspective and be more
supportive of your man
Shawn
A relationship is a two-way thing; one person cannot form a
relationship, it has to be two people coming together to form that
union. However, a man is a man and a woman is a woman—we all see the man
as the head of the family, he is the provider and he has the
responsibility of making his lady happy, providing and even protecting
her to the best of his abilities.
Now, how do we connect a relationship being a union between two
people and that the fact that the man ought to be the provider? I still
feel that the man should play a huge role in providing but the lady
should as well play a role in supporting—like they say, behind every
successful man is a woman, right? That means the woman has a role of
supporting.
In the case of a relationship, it could get overly boring when the
man solely pulls the strings every time—the dates, the gifts and the
rest of it—this would take away that element of spark in the
relationship if the woman shows no desire in taking a part in those
responsibilities.
In marriages as well, this also comes up, as some women also have
that mentality that their duty doesn’t also include the financial part.
No matter how rich a man is I think he would feel proud to have a lady
that can come up with the goods without his intervention—we really are a
proud gender and we love to show off with our women a lot, and a woman
that can come up with the goods would win our respect, that’s if she
doesn’t do it to spite the man.
Respect is highly needed in every relationship, and respect isn’t
just given, it’s earned; Jay Z is the man, but he would always give
Beyonce that respect because she has earned it.
I would conclude by saying; no man would be happy when his lady
becomes the boss in the paying department, but it wouldn’t be absolutely
nice when she also cannot do anything. In a scale of hundred percent,
I’d give the man 60 to 65 percent responsibility and probably 35 to 40
percent to the woman in the sharing of financial responsibilities.
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