Your relationship with yourself is the central template from which all others are formed.
The relationship you have with yourself is the central relationship in your life.
At the heart of all the elements that make up your life experience family, friends,
love relationships, work is you. This is why an audiobook about the rules of love
begins with a rule not about relationships with others, but rather about the relationship
you have with yourself.
The quality of the relationship between you and your self is paramount, for all
your other relationships are based on it. This relationship acts as a template from
which all the unions in your life are shaped, setting the quality, tone, and texture for
how you relate to others and how they relate to you. It establishes the working model
of how to give and receive love. The depth and quality of the link between you and your
self ultimately determines the success of your relationships with others. If an authentic
love relationship is what you desire, then the first natural step you must take is to learn to
love, honor, and cherish yourself as a truly precious and lovable being.
The place within you that generates self love is the exact same place that
attracts authentic love from others. If that source is clouded, your ability to attract a
relationship is eclipsed. In order to bring light to that inner source, you will need first to
leam how to give to yourself what you are seeking from another. Love creates more love,
and when your own inner love light shines, you open yourself to experience the beautiful
wonder of a deep and powerful connection with another being.
At its core, loving yourself simply means believing in your own essential
worthiness. It is nurturing a healthy sense of positive self regard and knowing in your
heart that you are a valuable link in the universal chain. Loving yourself also means
actively caring for every facet of yourself. It shows up in every action you take, from
putting on a sweater to protect yourself from a chill to leaving a job that does not
fulfill you. It means tuning in to your own wants and needs and honoring them the
exact same way you want your partner to attend to you.
Not everyone grows up to have an innate sense of high self esteem or
worthiness. In fact, most of us need to work at our experience of valuing ourselves to
some degree throughout our lifetimes. Each person feels insufficient in one or more
areas, whether physical, intellectual, financial, or in interpersonal dynamics, emotional
maturity, or spiritual growth. However, respecting, nurturing, honoring, and cherishing
yourself is your birthright and something you can learn. Loving yourself is the best way
to learn how to love another. Love is an action that requires certain understandings,
skills, and capacities. By practicing loving with yourself, you train yourself to advance to
the next level…learning how to love another.
Your relationship with yourself is the central template from which all others are formed.
Only when you have successfully mastered taking care of your own needs can
you know how to extend that same attention to others. When you respect the validity
of your own thoughts and feelings, you can apply that consideration to others. When
you believe within yourself how valuable you are, you can then bestow authentic
Learning self love is the first step you must take in order to tap into the inner reaches of
your heart and soul and discover all that you are worth.
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